And the band played on.
Well, not exactly a band, more like a tale of woe continued to grow.
Recovering from COVID, tick.
Next cab off the rank was a scan for some neck issues I have had for many years.
I had to go for a scan at Caloundra with the wonderful crew at X-Ray & Imaging, which I had put off for a couple of weeks.
I delayed it because I had been recovering from COVID and I don’t really like getting scans or putting my head in anything smaller than a hula-hoop.
Now, I might mention that sticking my head in a scrum for about 20 years caused the problems, which actually means I am a slow learner, but these days I’m not keen to stick my head into anything.
At this stage, I should probably mention I am claustrophobic.
Now the nice lady told me how long it would take and what would happen, which is helpful as I usually try and count things or take my mind off what is happening by dreaming about something nice.
Did I mention that Kentucky Fried was two doors up and I could smell the Colonel from where I was lying?
I haven’t had chook from there for years, so I dreamt about a visit directly after the scan if I survived.
So, I was counting chicken pieces as the machine whizzed around my melon and I survived.
As promised, I raced next door and was puzzled about what to order as things had changed since my last visit.
A Zinger Bowl looked good so I ordered what I thought was a bowl but got a box.
I must have mumbled.
Four bits of spicy chicken, chips, gravy and a burger – awesome.
I inhaled the pieces first and then took a massive bite of the burger.
I had no idea what was in it.
Something caught in my throat, I started gagging, immediately thinking that I survived the scan only to be taken out by the Colonel with an errant chicken bone.
Eventually, I go with swallowing as I couldn’t hack it up, thinking about how that was going to hurt coming out the other end, but then I realised it was a corn chip.
It’s the Zinger Bowl basically in a bun?
Finger lickin’ good may be the resurrected slogan but I want to know what genius decided to put corn chips in a burger.
The Colonel would be appalled.
Ashley Robinson is a columnist with Sunshine Coast News and My Weekly Preview. His views are his own.