In the struggle for equality and recognition, let’s be careful not to upend the scales with anger.
The fury over misuse of power and maltreatment of women in our Parliament and elsewhere is the energy we need to forge a new path.
After all, raging against the machine is the road to bring about needed systemic change. Throughout history, daring action by the brave is the only thing that ever has.
But we have to be careful not just to pile on hate and discrimination. We have to watch that we do not correct vile and sexist behaviour towards women with revulsion of men.
It is fact that almost all of our societal structures were built by and for men.
It is fact that until very recent times, the females of the species were considered weaker and less capable. There were rules and expectations for us that did not apply to men.
But we are blessed to live in a time in history when we now know better and in a nation that is updating policies and trying to improve practices.
We are far better off than we were, and far better off than many other places.
Important, but seemingly lost in the high emotion and gatherings of concerned people, is the fact that most men are good, fair and respectful.
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Yet for $17.17, I can buy a coffee cup on Etsy that says “male tears”. For $17.99, I can buy an “I hate men” t-shirt on Amazon, or for $5 more, I can get a long-sleeved version and wear it in public.
For $2.43, I can get a “no mansplaining” sticker on redbubble.com and put it on my car.
Of course, those who peddle these things would say these are examples of ironic messaging and acerbic humour — all in good fun.
But can you imagine the same thing being allowed if the targeted gender was women?
The venting of the female spleen in that way does not progress anything but more acrimony and marginalisation.
Like guilt or grief, in itself it achieves nothing at all.
There is a notion that a woman could never be a misandrist, #BecausePatriarchy (as Twitter would say).
It’s the same argument that contends that a person from a racial minority cannot express racist views no matter what is they say because minorities lack power.
This is simply not true.
Gender equality does not mean homogeny. We are gloriously, wonderfully different.
And there is not just one kind of woman or man: masculinity does not equal brutish, just as femininity is not mean frilly and feeble.
We need to treat men the way we are demanding that men treat women: respectfully and equally.
Our divided society needs more healing and to do that we must help the genders have equal voice and equal humanity, not just vie for the sharpest tongue or the most powerful vantage point.
We are all better than this.
Jane Stephens is a USC journalism lecturer, media commentator and writer.
